A recent study by researcher Brad Gilbreath found that your relationship with your boss at work affects your quality of life nearly as much as does your relationship with your spouse! And a Gallup survey reported that the number one reason that people leave jobs is that they no longer wish to work for a bad boss.

Before accepting a new job, it makes sense to do a thorough amount of due diligence to investigate the person who is likely to affect your quality of life in such a major way. Here are some suggestions and strategies for how to do that:

1. Know Yourself

You may have strong preferences for what type of boss is the best fit for you and if so, you want to be clear about those preferences before you evaluate whether to accept a particular job. Do you want a boss who is very involved in your day-to-day work, or someone who is mostly hands off? Do you want a boss who enjoys a lot of off-the-job socializing with subordinates or do you want a strictly business relationship? Do you want a boss who loves frequent face-to-face meetings or who thinks email is the most efficient form of communication? There are no right or wrong answers here, just self-assessment so that you can match up what you are seeking with the right job opportunity.

Carl Robinson, a business psychologist and principal of Advanced Leadership Consulting advises, "Not only is it important to ‘know thyself' but to be ‘true to thyself.' Make a list of ‘must haves' and ‘wants.' You can compromise on the wants but don't give up on your ‘must haves.' Too frequently, candidates accept jobs working for people they hoped would fulfill their ‘must haves' even though those aspects were never promised. Bosses rarely change into what we wished they were."

2. Pay Attention To A First Impression

In interpersonal psychology, there's a hypothesis that the very first interaction you have with someone can be predictive of your entire relationship with them. I've observed this phenomenon to be true many times. If your prospective boss is bullying, patronizing, rude, or dismissive to you in the interview process, you can probably expect more of the same as his/her employee. Watch to see if he/she values your time and keeps the promises made about the interview deadlines and process. Notice in his/her conversational style if your input is valued vs. ignored or attacked. Observe whether disparaging comments are made about other people (because if they are, you could be next!).

Note that the advice above does not mean that the prospective boss should be totally smooth and charming. See the warning about narcissists at the end of this article.

3. Interview Others Rather Than Rely Solely On Your Own Interview

Cathy Goodwin, a Seattle area career consultant who works virtually with clients all over the world, advises, "Don't rely too much on your own interview impressions. Some bosses are really terrific – they develop their subordinates, fight for their subordinates' raises, and act as mentors – but they will not show strong interpersonal skills with someone they've just met." This means that to get the most accurate information, you have to branch out and interview other people about your prospective boss.

The single best way to evaluate a boss is to interview people who once worked for this person, but who no longer do so. These people are in the best position to have good information AND to feel free to disclose it. The best question to ask is, "Would you want to work for [name of boss] again?"

To find former employees of an organization, first ask everyone you know if they know someone who once worked at [name of company]. Social networking Web sites like LinkedIn.com might also help you to make connections. Google is helpful, too, as so many resumes are online. In doing these type of interviews, make sure you talk to more than one person. And especially ensure that you aren't making a career decision based on one disgruntled former employee.

The second best way to evaluate a boss is to ask to speak to current employees of the organization. When you talk to these people, read between the lines. If someone describes the boss as, "A mix of good and bad," that could be code for, "Hellish boss." Lukewarm reviews mean that the employees are just being careful not to get caught saying negative things about someone who still has power over them. Instead of neutral feedback, you want to hear rave reviews, something like, "She's the best boss I've ever had. Really knows her stuff and very much a leader," or, "He's a tough boss but I respect him and I'm learning so much, it is totally worth it to work this hard for someone as smart as he is."

4. Assess Attrition

Investigate the level of attrition within a boss' department. Unless you are talking about a start up, discovering that everyone is fairly new is a bad sign. Some questions to ask about this are:

• How long have you worked for [name of company]?
• How long have the different team members worked for you?
• Was there someone in this role before me? Where did that person go? How long was he/she in this position?
• Did anyone internally want this job?

5. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Ask open-ended questions of the prospective boss to encourage him/her to share with you his/her personality, style, values, etc. Questions to ask a prospective boss include:

• What do you enjoy most about your job?
• If you could change one thing about working here, what would it be?
• What is your philosophy regarding management?
• What would be most important for me to accomplish in the next 90 days?
• What do you anticipate will be the toughest challenge for this department over the next year? What, if any, would my role be in tackling it?
• What are the characteristics of people who tend to succeed in this job?
• Every boss is different - what would be the key factor in working well with you?
• Can you tell me about some of the successes of your former employees? (Watch to see if he/she can come up with some great examples...if there aren't any, that's a problem).
• How often would we typically communicate? What is your preferred way to communicate with direct reports? Meetings? Phone? Email? Scheduled or spontaneous? (Look for any big mismatches between your preference and that of your prospective boss).

6. Meet Some Peers

Peers can be incredibly influential, too, in affecting your work quality of life. If you haven't already met some of them during the interview process, ask to meet with them before accepting an offer. You may spend most of your waking life with work peers - you want to ensure that these are people you like at least a little bit.

I jokingly advise my clients to use the "Denver airport during a snow storm" test. If you were on a business trip with your boss and several co-workers and a snow storm stranded you at Denver International Airport, would you feel like you had entered the nine circles of Hell or would you be OK with spending lots of unplanned time with this group of people?

7. Beware of Narcissists and Forgive Rough Edges

If a situation seems too good to be true, watch out! The worst situations sometimes seem fabulous on the surface because a narcissistic boss will know exactly what to say and how to act to reel you in. And if he/she is surrounded by groupies, those people won't warn you, either. Be wary of someone who is excessively charming and flattering and who makes you feel simply wonderful. By contrast, authentic people have a few rough edges.

Dr. Debra Condren, a business psychologist, career advisor, and author of "AmBITCHous", recounts, "Years ago as a young professional, a prospective boss asked me, ‘And are you married? Any kids?' I recoiled a bit. At the same time, I assessed the situation and determined—correctly, as it turned out—that he was simply interested and curious. I mindfully answered his question straight up: yes on both counts. Though clueless about legally and ethically correct interview questions, he turned out to be a wise and kind mentor—the father of twin toddlers who got the juggling act we as parents manage. He turned out to be a lovely boss to work for, which I did, for two years, while my son was a toddler. It was a great job, flexible hours, and offered excellent training and support. Had I knee-jerk axed him and the opportunity based on his blunder, I would have lost out."

8. Trust Your Instincts

It is a smart strategy to trust your gut instinct about a particular situation and boss. If you have a nagging feeling that there is something 'off' about a prospective boss, keep on doing research until you have a better idea what it might be. Because this investigative process can take awhile, you need to start doing research well before a deadline to accept or decline a job offer. The effort you invest in this detective work may well prove to be the savviest investment you ever made in your own career and well-being!